On the Edge of Serious Kitty Fame

I am feeling good tonight. I finished up a huge project today and now it is DONE. Sadly, I am not at liberty to tell you about it yet, but I am feeling right proud of myself, and feel that I should be patted on the back a few times, it was a new one for me. Stay tuned....

Here's some fun. Freaky Venus and Madame Mim may soon be Internet video stars! It went something like this...

Last weekend, our new friend Aleta, came down to a Paul and Lorraine show, and brought four of her friends, (delightful all, one was even a Flash Girls fan, blast from the past!) and one of the friends, Colette, turns out owns a Laser Pointer Business. Now anyone who has cats knows how important these little things are, HOURS of entertainment.

We started talking, she has generously agreed to donate laser pointer to my Bengal Rescue Group, and it came out that she has been wanting to do a Kitty Video for the laser website.

Hello? Bengals. She needs Bengals. MY Bengals. Can you see it? Bengals chasing lasers on the Cat Wheel???? There are a few You Tube vids with cat wheel and lasers, but they are short things people have got by luck, mostly. My Bengals LIVE to chase lasers. And anything else. They will work as many hours as it takes, to get a good shot (kind of like Malena shooting our vid, which is very, very close, by the way)

And I just happen to have a handy soundtrack ready too. Go listen to The Fox again. Perfect? Who knows where this could go. My sisters dog was once nearly on Ripleys Believe it or Not. ( they made him a full suit of armour , but didn't want to ship him and leave him for two weeks and could not go themselves )

CAA and I are talking. I can see it now. We will call it "Life in the Jungle"

My Friend who is the Assistant to a Director who may be making a Movie based on one of my Boss's books, wants to be mentioned here, and let everyone know it is 92 degrees in Portland and she forgot deodorant today. She says "Yay Armpits!"

(yes, that is JUST the sort of exciting thing we top level Personal Assistants talk about. She also called me Sparklepants, which I kind of liked.)

Love and Superstar Kitties,
Lorraine

I know you won't believe this....

Bengals are smart. Scary smart. Look at Jungle Love 2 yesterday, taking the grate off the heating duct, with no claws, knowing that if she could get it off , she could go down there and hide.

I didn't see this one coming tho...

When I got home tonight, Venus and Mim had started the dishwasher for me.

There it was, running. I sure hadn't started it. It wasn't on when I left around six.

Do you think I might get them to do the laundry too?

My friend Anne from New York and I made a Plan today for getting Jungle Love 2 out of the ducts. We couldn't leave her there, in some sort of weird subterranean half life, wandering the ducts, scaring the children, haunting the walls. And there didn't seem to be anyone in the yellow pages who specialized in this sort of thing.

We decided on a live trap. If we put her food in it and wedged it tightly, she would come and there she would be. Like the best laid plans of the mice, we didn't end up having to. There she was, under the chair with her friend, Jungle Love 1. I got to the grate before she did, and Anne, who has tool skills, bolted it to the wall.

I bought Jungle Love 2 a cage today. She is going to live in it for a bit. It's not something I want to do, but if she has any chance of knowing me and being a friend, she can't keep hiding. It's large enough, litter, water, and I covered it so she will feel safe. She can look out tho, and see JL1, and now she can learn when I come in, she gets nice words and food.

We will do this for a bit, and see if she warms up at all. And take it from there. In another day I will start giving her a pet, so she can know that nothing bad will happen. JL1 is still remembering yesterday and did not come out to eat while I was there.

Slow going, these kitties.

Venus, Mim and I are going to go off and go over the chores that need to be done tomorrow. Stranger things have happened.

Love and adventures,
Lorraine

Birds, Bees and Blood

What a day. Earlier today I was covered in Bees. Now I am covered in Blood. But I jump ahead....

Before we even got to the bees, The Birdchick and I found an Oriole in the garage! He did not seem inclined to fly OUT, and indeed, sat happily with the bee supplies. She was able to catch him, and he sang quite happily in her hands. And, she, being a good sport and knowing I do love Orioles, let me hold him. I am posting the picture as much so you can see the nice bird, but also so you can see the new heights I have achieved with hair-styling. Yes, people, hours of work every morning before I nip into work, both on the hair and makeup. It is also a rare photo of me in PINK.



We did the Bee Things, The New Queen Kitty arrived and was installed in her hive. A full report is up, or will be shortly, over at the Birdchicks Blog. I just do the colour commentary.

But here I am, as you can see, Covered In Bees!



Keep in mind here that there is also a fair amount of Assistanting going on and one switches from learning new skills regarding the Birds and The Bees to hoping one has the skills to outwit the never ending e-mail and three phone lines and evil airlines all in moments.

Things did not, however, get exciting today until I got home.

(Ominous Silence.)

I went to greet and feed Jungle Loves 1 and 2, and found that Jungle Love 2 had dug INTO the wall, removed the heating grate and is now somewhere in the duct system of the Spooky House. I had no idea this was possible, but it seems like if it could be done, a Bengal would do it.

Fortunately, Jungle Love 1 is too FAT to get down. She had another escape plan. She bolted past me and out into the house. I trapped her in the sun room. Mim in there too and shut the door. She ran screaming and yowling and running around the room, Mim sat on the fireplace and screamed, Venus, on the other side of the door, screamed and threw herself against the doors.

I tried to remain calm.

I cold not pick her up, she is the strongest cat I have ever seem and fought like the Demon she is. I got a towel, and she got me with her remaining back claws. Both arms, bloodied and painful.

I did not feel like doing any force holding when I finally got her in the towel.

I took the struggling mess back into the room, and went and wrote the Rescue Group for advice. SO far nothing helpful. Sitting in the room with food out until she comes out and then b;ocking the grate MAY work, but I am pretty sure she can out-wait me.

And oh, just to end on a positive note, the keyboard I took from my old IMAC seems to work fine.

Love, Birds, Bees and Blood,
Lorraine

STUPID RAT CREATURES!

The Great Tea Spilling Episode, in which my STUPID STUPID RAT CREATURES (If you haven't read Jeff Smith's Bone Comics/graphic novels, you had just better go do so) spilled tea, with honey (teach me to cheat, I generally have Stevia) ALL over my laptop at the Spooky House, has had some interesting repercussions.

(quite a sentence, that, I'm rather proud..)

My DELETE, ENTER and QUESTION MARK keys no longer work. And when one spells as badly as I do, and goes as many places as I do, and asks as many questions as I do, they are a necessary part of the keyboard. I don't know what perhaps HALF of the keys actually do, there are a lot of them I could bid farewell to with no regrets, but why those??

And what do I do now? Should I wait for Dan Guy to come out in June? (he has promised computer help while he is here, in exchange for Rock.) Can he fix it? (I'd drop him an e-mail, but I have not much else to blog about and anyway, this is more fun) Do I call Apple and send the thing to them? Should I kill the cats? Is this even fixable? I can't simply sit here , going thru life, unable to delete, enter or ask questions...

My work computer is fine, so I have that, but quite a bit of work gets done at night.

Today is New Queen Kitty Day! The Birdchick is on her way with her, and we will be splitting the old hive, and trying to convince several hundred old bees that the new place and New Queen is far superior to the old.

Last night was Dog School. He was NOT a Canine Good Citizen. His test is next week, at which point we will learn he is repeating the class.

JL1 and JL2 are getting curious. If I open the door to their room, and sit in the doorway, JL2 will come out, and start eating and LOOKING. Venus and Mim will come to the door and LOOK, tho neither group seems to want to be any closer.

Yes, this is what I do for entertainment in the evenings. Especially since I can't enter, delete or question.

Love and Questions,
Lorraine

The Queen Is Dead. Long Live The Queen.

I am saddened to report that at some point in the night last night, Queen Kitty departed this life, and has now gone to that Great Beehive in the Sky.

It is believed that Queen Kitty, despite her most excellent attendants, and diet of sugar water, was simply not strong enough to survive till her Hiving. It will stand as a lesson to all future Queens, as to what can happen if you show up Way to early and have to live in a Queen Carrier for a week.

Queen Kitty is survived by one Worker Bee. (who is not expected to live much longer, such is her grief at the passing of her Queen.)

Funeral services are private, and her body will most likely end up as artwork in a Lisa Snellings or Cat Mihos Art Project. As did the first Queen Kitty workers.

Flowers may be sent to the Surviving Hives.

In Mourning,
Lorraine