Monday, December 03, 2007

Malena's Weather Report











First of all, let me say 2 days of RAIN is not severe weather conditions! People here in La La land are such P*ssies. We get 2 days of rain and everyone goes nuts. "Ohhh the rain! We can't go anywhere" The freeways are jammed and there are accidents everywhere. Mind you, everyone still goes 75 oon the freeway. Hmmm. Wonder if there is a connection there? Buck up little shoppers! (I'd say campers, but WHO camps in LA? Not ONE Hummer in my neighborhood has ever been off road. Let's be serious) It's very simple...when it rains you drive slower! What a concept. I should copyright that...."Like It's like raaaaining, should we go like, ah! sloooower!" (LA accent insert here)













Meanwhile in the midwest there are REAL severe weather conditions. Enough snow to hold you hostage in your house! Miss Fabulous had to cancel her gig due to the weather. I do love to go see Fablo in the winter. Well, ok, in March. That way I can still wear my vintage dead fluffies and feel like I am roughing it in the "cold". When I was a wee lass I grew up in Idaho where it got to be 40 BELOW 0 at times, so I'm no wuss, I'm just an ectomorph.


A happy medium between LA fires big enough to summon up the powers of hell and a blizzard that grounds Santa would be PERFECT. Where would that BE I wonder?


I don't mind the rain. It gives all the flowers, brought in from everywhere else BUT here, (LA is really a desert) a drink and it clears away the smog in the air. NICE! And it gives me a reason to wear patent leather. Like I need a reason! But I can call my outfit, "rain attire" you see. That way all the old bitties don't think I'm into S&M for ONE day.




No one ever believes me when I tell them I'm really a housewife who makes brownies for the kids and lives in a house with a white picket fence around it. (makes for a great disguise for what's inside you see)


Rumor has it that I have a part in a movie playing a leather clad Harley Davidson ridin, gun slingin criminal...who happens to be a lesbian! Sign me up!!! Getting to shoot big guns and beat up boys? What could be better? It's such a change from my last film. Ha ha. I wonder if I'll ever be chosen to play a midwestern nerd who moved to LA to become a moviestar? Hm, might be out of my range. Miles always roles his eyes when I do all my character voices. The old texas cowgirl erks him the most I think. (It's so fun) My favorite is...

"Geter dun fer God!" Which btw, was a real saying on a christian church in the south. Yes, someone send me the photo!





















When I tried to link the photo, this peaceful, loving message appeared on the blog. It just doesn't get any better than this does it? Can I get an Amen? Hallelujah!









I wonder if Jesus cried during the Christian Crusades?

14 Comments:

At 6:00 PM , Blogger Rubius said...

hehe... I thought that first pic looked familiar and then I saw the name... kits beach is in Vancouver!... no wonder there are rainclouds above the city and Point Grey where UBC (my alma mater) is located. That's essentially a pic of my old stomping grounds (sort of, I rarely hung out at that particular beach) if you count the background.

I love snow... we had one and a half days of snow this weekend (it is all rain water now) and I LOVED it, even though my tree was cut down (MY TREE!!!! I am still in mourning)

Rain attire indeed!!! lol

That automatic response was GREAT...funny funny... I will withhold my 'jesus' comments, for now, in the hope of not pissing people off. I love those ridiculous road signs though.

now the question is 'get what done for god'? it reminds me of a 'spay or neuter your pet' or prostate cancer exam ad ('do it for dad' is the local prostate cancer test campaign slogan)... hmmm maybe that's not what was intended.

 
At 8:18 PM , Blogger Malena said...

Yes, "Geter done" is a common red neck expression used for all kinds of things. Kind of like Y'all or You'ens is. It's quite sad I know these things. ha haaa

I just grabbed a beach photo from the net that looked like a rainy day in LA. Who knew it was vancouver. My dorkness is starting to show.

Your tree was cut down? Why?

And you all know the Jesus comment was done in good fun. In this group, HOW could anyone piss anyone off. We are nerds. Nerds unite under all creeds. Hell, some of us speak Klingon!

 
At 8:28 PM , Blogger ivenotime said...

snicker snicker, nerds indeed, my class this evening agreed that I am still a nerd, and always will be (tho they said it lovingly (i think?!?) and Rubius, tree? what? do tell dear! but ok, i hate snow. really hate it. i have shoveled and snowplowed snow twice and ice once and i am Officially Sick of Winter Weather. sigh.....

 
At 10:06 PM , Blogger Rubius said...

Well, we are Hollywierd North, you know!!

I lived under the tallest tree in the neighborhood, I benefited from its shade that keep my apartment cool, my plants able to handle the rooftop deck, and I enjoyed the privacy it afforded. I originally liked this place because it had ivy covering it's outside, the tallest tree around, and greenery lining the front. I came home a week ago after work to see a pile of wood randomly thrown down beside the building and NO TREE. The cottonwood's base was over a meter wide where they cut it at ground level. The tree was so large that I was able to identify my apartment building from it while my airplane was landing last summer (I live pretty close to the airport, but not that close).

Although we don't really know because NO ONE TOLD US IT WAS HAPPENING (gee, can you tell I'm bitter? my landlord KNEW how much I liked that tree from the day I moved in)... I think it was cut down because it's roots had infiltrated the plumbing system and it was potentially causing difficulties... or maybe people were worried about winter storm but I STILL don't think either of those were good excuses. Dealing with a section of the root system ... or cutting down the tree?..hmmm, which one is easier?, which one is faster? and that tree wasn't about to topple on its own, it was secure and healthy, until they butchered it.

Anyway, I have been rather heartbroken over it... randomly calling out 'my tree' and LaMie, who comes out on the deck with me, kept stopping to stare around with her ears laid back whenever I open the door, I swear it is like she is saying 'something is wrong here, something is missing'.

 
At 10:30 PM , Blogger Rubius said...

oh.. and they tore down all the ivy last year... and some of the bushes in the front... so my lovely green hideaway in plain sight is quickly disappearing.

 
At 10:35 PM , Blogger spacedlaw said...

Awww...Rubius, what a sad story.
Trees take such a long time to grow and none at all to destroy.
:(

Malena dear, what you are telling me of the rain in LA reminds me of Rome. Same thing there, people don't know how to slow or even how NOT to squeeze themselves into 4 lanes when there are only 3.
And the few days when there is snow or ice (not every year and never inside the city) pandemonium ensues.
I love a good layer of snow, especially in the country side (in the city it gets dirty too quick) but like it better looking out from my window with a nice cup of tea in hand.

 
At 4:33 AM , Blogger ivenotime said...

awww Rubius, what a shame, that's so sad. Hard to resolve, especially when it was so large, hugs to you and Lamie.

 
At 11:36 AM , Blogger Rubius said...

Thank you lovely ladies for your kind comments. The tree is missed. I am considering running off with a chunk of wood to use as our family yule log. We will have to see if there are any chunks small enough for our little wood stove.

Snow in Rome... what a thought. Although I love snow in the country because it has such staying power... I think I prefer snow in the city because it makes such a dramatic contrast to the dirt and dark of city life... the fact that it gets dirty and loses that magic more quickly just makes it that much more special.

You are welcome to send snow north with your thoughts... just think 'snow more north... snow more in Vancouver'. I will take it all!!!

 
At 2:06 PM , Blogger Malena said...

I think we would all love to see snow in Rome. When I was modeling in Italy, I never got to go to Rome. It was a night here, a night there. I didn't do much sight seeing. Somday....
I work so much (and thankful for it) that I go where they send me, which isn't usually Rome.

Regarding the tree, we can all pitch in and buy you another little one, if your landlord will allow. Let us know. "THe LaMie Tree Fund" hey, together we can do anything...

 
At 3:00 PM , Blogger Rubius said...

Aw Malena, you are such an angel. Thank you for such a kind thought and actually I already have plans to acquire a tree or five and fill up that corner of the deck. I love greenery and I have made my home into an indoor jungle (I am VERY happy LaMie avoids munching on poisonous plants) and I am pretty sure I can pull off the outdoor jungle too.

Thank you, Malena, for that wonderful offer (you always impress me with your generosity). At this time of year there are MUCH more needy folks than me (and a food bank deserves tree money much more than I need a tree). .... and really, I am lucky, Vancouver is a very green city and I have parents who have 5 acres of forest on Vancouver Island.

It is true, together we can do anything. Thank you for the offer but there are MUCH more needy folks and causes than me (World Wildlife Fund for instance is maybe my favourite cause)

 
At 3:24 PM , Blogger Rubius said...

(and I may have a line on free trees!!! especially with the Xmas season in full swing) thanks again

 
At 4:41 PM , Blogger Kitty Cat said...

Tree murderers! don't they remember the LOTR? those trees can cause quite a ruckus.
so sorry, little tree hugger.
i am in Seattle today, outside it is pouring, nay, dumping rain, so much that 1-5 is closed and we have to go a different route to get to Portand, what!!??! crazy!!
that photo of Malena in the winged sleeves corset is a personal favorite, just exactly the photo i love to cheer me up.
xoxo

 
At 4:53 PM , Blogger Fabulous Lorraine said...

White. All here is white. No trees. No roads. No car except for green no parking tickets , sticking up all over....

Food is low. I have been burning the furniture for heat....

Wrote a song for Venus to the tune of " Playground in my mind" What she did to a box of my ,uh, Moon Time " suppiles deserves some retribution....

WIll post it tomorrow...

 
At 6:42 PM , Blogger Dan Guy said...

So sad for your tree, Rubius.

The weather has been cold and wet and overcast here, which is kind of a nice change from sunny Florida.

 

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