Malena's Brownie Workout
Hello LaMies! What a week! I had some dental work done, so I haven't been talking much. (I know, I don't believe it either) So, I'm just hanging around the house making brownies..and doing my ball workout. Quite a combo wouldn't you say?
Miles is quite the brownie Connoisseur. I love to bake so I don't mind rising to the challenge of baking the ultimate chocolate confection...
Tonight I made double chocolate brownies with whipped creme (complete with a splash of Bailey's Irish creme) then I grated some dark chocolate on top. I must say it was heavenly. You know you've got the dieting thing down when you can make brownies and only eat 1! (Ok, I ate one and a half)
I also (accidentally) learned to ski with my yoga mat. Yes, it was a "retard in a leotard" moment. There I am balancing on my ball. The video says to roll on your stomach and push out, catching yourself with your hands. Well, Miles was walking own the hall and I thought, "Hey I'll do something cool to show him how limber I am!" So, I jump on the ball..which skids on the yoga mat and swoosh! My entire body makes a penguin style body surf onto the kitchen tile while my legs are still on top of the ball. Ahhhhhh! Miles just laughed and said, "Do you need help Lover?"
I guess the "Olive Oil goil" didn't leave me in middle school after all. So much for swan dives ah? I always call Miles Basil, from Fawlty Towers...but then he calls me PEG..from Married with Children. (I think it's because of the tight pants and high heels) But I took the cake on clutzy behavior today.
The only thing more crazy was when Lorraine and I went to a water park. (She'll die that I'm sharing this with you)
At every park there is one ride the Moms stay away from. This time, it was the surf machine. Yes, they really had an indoor water surf ride. Ohhh, that was it! I had to do it. I've always wanted to surf. I did notice however, that everyone over 50 lbs. would lose some part of their suit when they fell. NOt to worry, I thought. I have my black mesh swim skirt on! And with that, off I went. I begged Lorraine to come with me but, NOOooo. NO WAY she said. Yes! It was finally my turn. The little instructor dude gives me a quick lesson on how to hold the board. (No one knew me, so what the heck!) I jumped on the board and with a quick swish, I was down the wave, or up the wave. I couldn't tell, I was just spinning. The, I feel the cold water rushing up my backside. Oh no! My butt check is in full view. I hold on to my suit for dear life. (The goth girl swin skirt was now long gone) LORRAINE is laughing so hard people are concerned for my emotional well being. In mid snort, she cackles, "It's ok, she's my friend"
Finally the board stopped and I quickly converted my suit from a g-string to a full piece again. Every old..and young man was looking at my with empathy, trying not to laugh. And just when I thought I was the biggest dork of all, I saw the girl who went after me....putting her top back on. It's always a show with LaM..always.
posted by Fabulous Lorraine @ 11:19 PM
6 Comments
6 Comments:
**wipes a tear from his eye**
Thank you... I needed that... I'm still chuckling. I'm not sure which was funnier though... the "retard in a leotard" moment or the water park. I am very much looking forward to meeting you and Ms. Lorraine at Balticon... aside from wanting to see/hear y'all play live, you two just seem so fun and down to earth... I cannot possibly imagine a boring time around either of you. :)
You two are too too funny, from feeling guilt ridden that I have never even tried a sprout let alone grow them (cuz I have the black thumb of death with green things) to praying a brownie will drop on my lap to laughing about exercise balls and water parks...its a fun way to start Sunday morning. Waterparks can be deadly for the ego - my poor sister went on a straight drop ride where the object was to go down with legs together, like a human sled. Mid ride, her legs split open in v, she spun head down with her legs splayed in the air(and her legs are as long as my body)kicking wildly in an attempt to keep her bottoms on. It was hysterical, and we still laugh about it (but not as much as laughing about me jumping on the ice on our pond demonstrating how safe it was, then falling thru... )
I swear that every water park has at least one "ride" that's been designed by someone who's been told "Right, now you have to ensure that at least one part of the swimsuit comes undone on at least 80% of the people who try this ride out!" At Raging Waters in San Jose I once saw a girl fall out of the top half of her one-piece Speedo (and if you've ever seen those things, you'll know you don't just "fall out" of those things)!
You two crack me up. And make me feel so much better about doing silly clutzy things like lifting my foot to go up the step and still managing to trip over it. ;P It's good to admit your clumsiness - laughter is never something to be (too) embarrassed over.
::chuckle:: Those are both pretty funny. :)
I flubbed using my eldest's jump rope today, trying to show her how to use it. In front of her, her little sister, her father, my little brother, his teenage son, and his two friends. It's always better with an audience, don't you think?
Mistress Mousey: Just wait until you're in your third trimester. Your belly, literally, gets bigger overnight and you misjudge how big it is and run into your husband, or the cabinet, or......you get the picture. ;)
Y'know? It is enormously reassuring to hear that She Who Always Looks Perfectly Poised in Photos has her moments of less than total gracefulness.
When I was about thirteen, I did a beautiful and perfect racing dive into a swimming pool full of boys and other members of the public, and surfaced with my green Speedo onepiece around my waist. That was a tiny bit embarrassing, but I think I have got over it in the intervening half-lifetime. Haven't acquired much coordination, though.
so funny i could cry!
*cries*
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