I admit, my life is weird!

Sometimes, I hear my conversations and think, "THIS is a bloggable moment." I've had a lot of bloggable moments this week and the more I think about it, the more I realize I live a very strange life.

Miles brought home some cool stuff from the studio the other day...including highly corrosive acid.
Cool! I told him that would be MY weapon of choice if a burglar penetrated the compound! I went into great detail about how cool it would be to throw the whole bottle in bad guy's face and watch it melt. He was a little disturbed by my strange fantasy. But, hey at least he knows I can hold my own. Between the acid and the hell boy gun, I'd be set man! (don't we all have Laura Croft fantasies?)

Kitty is coming over today to talk photos. Wehoooo! I'm getting ready for the Alter Ego shoot. (Unfortunately this includes MORE dieting) I wonder, am I ever going to be able to eat bread again? Not as long as I work in THIS town. It's worth it though. I love my job(s)! And Lorraine kindly reminds me, "You're Hollywood fat. To the rest of the world, you're sexy as hell!" Thank GOD for Fablo and her reality checks! What would I do without her?

I called the Mortician the other day. He asked what kind of casket I wanted! I asked for Black and silver or Burgundy. BIG surprise there. I always go with what I call, "The Bruise Pallet". He's so cool. We have to do the shoot at night(YEAH BABY)because they have REAL funerals during the day. It felt like I was planning my OWN funeral. How fun! I gotta tell ya, caskets are cushy! I don't know why they put so much effort into making them comfortable, it's not like the customer will notice. Which leads me to another story....

I went to the Dr. the other day for a few routine tests. First they had to warm up my feet. (Good luck) They tried and tried....even microwaved the towels. After the first try the Dr. said, "Take a look at this! The readings can't be accurate. These results are of a dead person! Do it again" and off they went to re-do the test. After running it 3 times, I think they gave up. RESULTS: Dead, dead, dead. I didn't have the heart to tell them why....not that they would believe me anyway. Hee hee! (This is a true story) This is an example of truth being weirder than fiction.

I've been working on our LaM store, with the help of Danth our web manth. We love him! Lorraine and I are trying to find products we think you'll like. Strange, odd, eclectic things that no one ever really NEEDS, but wants just for the fun of it. Like bats head root...
.....and handmade books to put your treasures in.
..and perfume that smells like sex and chocolate. (no really!)..and of course, Graveyard dirt! No we didn't rob the graveyard without permission. I have a special friend who helps with that sort of thing. LEGALLY of course. (Although the thought of Fablo and I in black mercenary suits sneaking around an old graveyard does sound fun.) I don't think the tenants would mind. It would be the most flesh they've seen since their embalming! We'd love your input on the store. Tell us what kind of products you like, dislike and think are just plain shallow and stupid....like Paris Hilton merch. I kid I kid!

I made "Supermodel Stanzi" an outfit a few days ago. She loves to wear clothes. Although BOTH of our dogs are neutered, they still get their freak on when Stanzi wears doggie outfits. (who knew Dogs liked lingerie too?)
There IS a reason I call them PIG_DOG_BAT_FROGS!

Until next time, this is your favorite Witchy vampire chic signing off.
(photo taken from a thingie's website)